The Truth

How am i goin to find myself, when the world changed around me...i questioned myself once and once again. I couldn't find the real answer for this particular issue that kept doubting me these few days...

I told Shin that i went to campus yesterday, just for the evening class that i don't feel like missed before CNY holiday. Then i find no companion for my dinner. So i walked home, oneself. Then she was showing her sympathy on me...I know i am all alone now. I feel myself left stranded somehow...sigh. I couldn't talk to strangers, I am shy to mix around with those acquaintance in class, i am just...how to say the word then...i feel so lonely further my study in USM now.

For only a heartbeat, i let myself dial his phone number, hoping that i would find someone to talk to, to feel the way that i felt all these while... Yet he didn't pick up the phone as i am hoping so. Perhaps it is too late. Perhaps he got morning class tomorrow. So i only can talk to myself, like i always do...

I remember every single person that used to walk with me, side by side. I remember the way we cheering each other; the way we keep walking in silent, without saying a word. I remember everything though i don't like to recall it most of the time. And the very last person that ever walk beside me and made me feel safe to walk with, I wonder would he turn up and walk into my life once again...

Perhaps i should have give you the answer before you left. Perhaps I was still doubting about my decision. But i shouldn't be. The truth lies at the base of my stomach, even though i can't say it loud...